Have absolute no reason to write something here tonight... actually, I should be writing something else.

Again, for no aparent reason I decided to waste some of my time changing the design of this diary... it's a passion for me to work with graphics. It's something I really enjoy...may be because it takes my mind away from other things.

I am tired. Cant feel my legs. And today my visit to the gym was physically painful. Cant really figure out why coz I exercise everyday and my body got used to this rythme already... my body really feels tired tonight.

Last night I did a very important (and scary) thing... I confessed to a friend I am liking someone... It was pretty terrifying because I have been keeping this to myself for the past year or so... so, it was a huge step. I couldn't keep it inside anymore. I feel weird though. I totally trust her. We met online a couple of years ago and she knows a lot about myself... but it was still a big thing for me. I have only told her coz I knew she would understand me (or at least to try to understand me!).
I still feel very silly and embarassed about my feelings because he will never look to me the same way I look to him...I want to let go of these feelings coz they won't take me anywhere happy. I kinda got used to the idea of not being noticed by him...but there are days when it hurts...and other days when I think "well, I knew deep down inside this couldn't be more than a fantasy."

Someone asked me to post a bit of my fiction here...and I said I would do so if someone was interested... but I am not sure if I should do it... I feel like I'll be exposing a lot of myself. No one has ever read it and the thought of putting it out there is scarying me. And whoever wants to read it won't probably understand anything coz it's way too long to post it all here (it's over 150 pages). I can pick a chapter and post it here though... I'll think about that. It will be hard to choose!

purplexxx

I think you should post the first chapter here, then get your book published. LOL, maybe not published but I think you will feel a lot better about your writing when you see all the positive feedback that comes from it. I really believe you are a good writer, from the way you write your journal entries!

I wanna thank you for encouraging me to post some of my writing here... and thank you for the compliments too. They mean a lot. They really do. I'll take your advice and post something here... my biggest problem comes from the fact that I am not a native english speaker, so you cannot expect something brilliant. I hope you see this coz I wanted to contact you but for some reason, neither your name or contact appear on the message you left.

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